jokes

Sadhu: Bachcha teri biwi ko chuddail chipak gayee hai. Upaaye karvaao.
Banta: Upayaye? Baba, agar do behenein gale mil rahi hain to is mein harz hi kya hai ?
 
Santa: Itne kam marks? Do thappad marne chahiye.
Pappu: Haan papa, chalo. Maine us saale master ka ghar bhi dekh rakha hai.
 
Santa and Banta were looking at an Egyptian Mummy at a museum.
Santa: Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Banta: Yes you are right. See lorry number is also written BC 1760 !!!
 
Teacher: Which animal flies in the air, but gives birth to young ones on land?
Santa (excited for the first time because he knows the answer)
Santa: AIRHOSTESS!!!!
 
A customer arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up their car, They were told that the keys had been accidentally locked in it.
He went to the service department and found a mechanic, Mr Santa working feverishly to unlock the driver`s side door.
As the customer watched from the passenger`s side, he instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open.
"Hey," he announced to the technician, "It`s open!"
"I know," answered Santa.- "I already got that side."
 
Mrs Banta phoned Banta in the office and said: "Darling, come home early, we are going to have my mother for dinner."

"Good" replied Banta, "make sure she`s prepared well".
 
The Sardarni asked her lover, Santa Singh

Santa Darling, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?

Sure replied Santa What's your phone number?
 
Once Santa Singh, the psychiatrist, met a friend and exclaimed, "I heard you are dead."

But you see I'm alive, smiled the friend.

Impossible, said Santa Singh. The man who told me is much more reliable than you.
 
She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots.
He sets off to Africa and disappears.

Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one.

He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *AGAIN* barefeet!"
 
Santa bought a car on loan... He didn't pay the dues, the bank took away his car.
Santa: If I knew this, I'd have taken a loan for my marriage also!
 
Banta ek Sadhu se bola: " Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao."
Sadhu: "Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?"
 
Santa: My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a lion's cage.
Banta: He probably got a lot of applause ven he got out.
Santa: I didn't say he got out.
 
Santa: I'm a proud father. My son is in m! edical college.
Banta: What's he studying?"
Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!
 
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