Sardar Jokes... no offence sikh bhaiyon .. :D

Once a sardar had to learn two essays for the exam. One is about friend and the other is about father. He had studied only about friend. But in the exam the essay asked was about father. Sardar dint give up. He replaced father with friend in the essay and it read:

"I am a very fatherly person, I have lots of fathers, My best father is my neighbor."

He ended the essay as, "A father in need is a father in deed....!"
 
Sardar's wish: when i die, i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the bus he was driving..
 
santa-singh
old-age
psychology
man-women
animal
engineering
help-desk
teacher
politician
police
others
doctor
work
husband
Mexican
parrot
students
aeroplane
america
pirate
parents
marriage
mother-in-law
women
chinese
son-in-law
english
office
president
love
bar
birds
girl-friend
brother-sister
Atheist
heaven-hell
stranger
Intellectual




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Funny Jokes: Sardar Joke

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NAPOLEAN: "In my Dictionary there is no word called 'IMPOSSIBLE'....

Sardarji: "What's the use of saying it now, you should have checked it before buying THE DICTIONARY !!
 
Bobby returns from his first day at school and immediately questions his father.

"Dad, today we had a Spelling Class - All the other kids could only say half the alphabet, but I knew the whole thing. Is that because I am a Sardar?"

"No son, that's because you are intelligent."

Bobby seeming content with the answer, asks his father another question, "Dad, today we had Math class - All the other kids could only count from 1-10, I could count from 1 to 20. Is this because I am a Sardar ??"

"No , that's because you are intelligent," replies his father.

Happy with the answer, Bobby poses another question to his father. "Dad, today we had Medical Examination, all the other boys were shorter than me, I was at least twice their height. Is that because I am a Sardar?"

The father replies, "No son, that's because you are 31 years old."
 
Sardar Dhakaal Singh is big hunter. Once he went to a zoo. At that time a big tiger escaped from its cage. The zoo officials sent everyone out of the zoo and closed the main gate. Now the tiger is inside the zoo but wandering freely. Zoo people requested sardar to be inside and trap the tiger in a cage. Scared but to avoid insult he went into the zoo in his jeep carrying a big gun.

While driving on one of the zoo's roads, he noticed that the tiger is chasing him. Feeling scared he drove the jeep fast but only to observe that the tiger is very near to the jeep. At that time the road separated into two paths ahead, one to the left and other to the right. Then cleverly dhakaal put the left indicator on and turned the jeep to the road on right. The tiger runs into the left path. With a sigh of relief, he drove forward. After some time the roads meet and the same situation arises again.

Once more the road divides into two and this time our sardar is smart enough to put the right indicator on and turned to left. This time the tiger goes into the road on right side. After some time the roads meet again to our sardar's misfortune and the tiger starts to chase him again. This time the road never divides and our sardar thought the tiger would catch him. Then a brilliant idea struck his mind. He slows down his jeep taking it to the left corner of the road. Then he held his hand outside and a gives signal which is given for vehicles which want to overtake. The
tiger this time overtakes his jeep and runs forward.



NOW TELL ME WHAT IS THE MORAL OF THE STORY??
ANSWER BELOW............
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MORAL: "There are Sardar Communities in Tigers
too".
 
Hi,

I�m sardar. Since I am not skilled in programming please delete all your inbox messages and switch off your mobile.

Thanks for your help.
Now pass this virus to others.
 
There is a group of 7 Sardars who plan to meet their old friend the President Dr. Zail Singh

The Sardars decide to take a taxi.

The taxi driver takes them to Presidents House.

The meter shows Rs. 28/-, so the taxi driver says, "You have to pay me Rs. 28/-."

Now, the Sardars have to share the cost among themselves and so they
decide to divide the total (Rs. 28/-) by the number of people, i.e. 7.


This is how they do the calculation to arrive at the answer:
____
7 | 28 = 13 ( 7 x 1 = 7, 7 x 3 = 21 ).
7
--
21
21
--
0
--

The driver is exceedingly happy upon receiving Rs. 13/- from each of the Sardars. He thanks them profusely and the feeling of happiness is writtern
on his face as he leaves them and proceeds his way.

Seeing this, the Sardars feel that they may have made a mistake.

They decide to ask Zail Singh about it. After all, the fellow was the
President of the nation!

They ask Zail Singh to check their calculation of the taxi fare.

Zail Singh ponders over the calculations and finally says, "See, I am not good at division. The process just boggles me but addition is something I am
an expert at. Let us add all the amounts you guys gave to the taxi
driver and check the result. This is how I do for those tax forms I get very often. The process is slow but is sure." The other sardars nod their heads(?) in appreciation.

The President writes as shown below and also explains as he writes on:
13
13
13
13
13
13
13
--
28
--
i.e. 3+3+3+3+3+3+ 3= 21 and 21+1+1+1+1+1+ 1+1=28 so this checks out.

He then says, "Yes, it's correct. But I can also call my close friend and Finance man Banta Singh.

Banta Singh arrives, and when told of the problem, he replies that he doesn't think it is a bad deal but says, "No problem! I will verify it via mathematical computation. I'll verify it with multiplication. That is
the best technique for this, you see!"

While others watch in admiration, Banta Singh goes on to write as
shown:
13
x7
--- (7*3=21 ,7*1=7 so 21+7=28)
21
+ 7
--
28 This checks out as well.
--
Then he says, "This is really fine. There should be no problem,
President Sahab. After all, it is correct in all the methods."
 
Sardar: Will u marry after I die

Wife : No I wiil live with my sister.

Wife : Will u marry , after I die .

Sardar: No I will also live with ur sister.
 
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Funny Jokes: Sardar Joke

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in an interview,

Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?

SARDAR: dhuurrrrrrrrrr..

Interviewr shouts: stop it !

SARDAR: dhurr dhup dup dup dup.
 
sardar is traveling via train. On his way, he feels the urge to go to the bathroom. So he goes and opens the bathroom door, which happens to have a mirror in the front. The sardar thinks there is another sardarji in there, quickly shuts the door and returns to his seat.

5 minutes later he goes again, only to find the same sardarji. An hour passes away, he's made 20 trips to the bathroom, only to find that the same person is still there.

So he finally gets ticked off, goes to the last compartment and tells the TC (Ticket Checker) what's been going on. The TC, who also happens to be a sardar, feels bad for him and promises to throw the bum out.

The TC walks down to the compartment with the troubled bathroom to get the sardarji out of the bathroom.

Few minutes later the TC comes back and tell the sardar "I'm sorry, I can't do anything. The guy in there is a railway staff member"
 
A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji.

He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"
 
Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
The Chinese friend just says "CHIN YU YAN" and dies.
Sardarji goes to China to find the meaning of his friend's last Words.

And finds It means "U R STANDNG ON the OXYGEN TUBE!"
 
Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.

His wife asked what you are doing.

He said I am seeing how I look while sleeping.
 
Man: Sardarji where were U born?
Sardarji: Punjab .

Man: Which part?

Sardar: Oye What part part, whole body Is born in Punjab Yaar".
 
A sardar was drawing money from ATM, the sardar behind him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****). "

The first sardar replies, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! U R wrong, Its 1258"
 
A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.
She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For Best Results put on Two Coats"
 
Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed.. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left."

Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don't worry ... we can fly just fine on two engines."

An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours. But don't worry .. we still have one engine left."

A sardarji passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"
 
One sardar came to Madras and wanted to do shopping in burma bazaar.

His tamilian friend told the Sardar that the prices will be costly and hence asked him to bargain for half the price.

Sardar went and asked the price of stereo for which the vendor told 2000 Rs. Sardar asked for Rs.1000. vendor told he can give for Rs.1800 for which sardar told no,no only Rs.900. Vendor told ok , i will give it for 1500 Rs for which sardar bargained for Rs.750.

It was going on like this when finally vendor out of irritation said he will give the Sardar the stereo free of cost. Our sardar asked whether he will give two
 
Two Sardarjis went into a pub and after ordering two beers took some sandwiches out of their packets and started to eat them. 'You can't eat your own sandwiches in here,' complained the pub-owner.

So the two sardars swapped their sandwiches.
 
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination which consists of Y/N type questions.

He takes his seat in the Examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his wallet out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Y for Heads and N for Tails.

Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperatley throwing the coin, swearing and sweating.

The invigilator,alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on. "Oye, I finished the exam in half an hour". "But yaar", he says, " I am rechecking my answers."
 
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