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Sardar Jokes... no offence sikh bhaiyon .. :D
Three Construction workers are working on the 20th floor of a tall building in Bombay.
One is a Mallu, the second is a Bengali and the third is a Sardarji. Every day all the three meet in the lunch hall and have their lunch together.
One fine day-the Mallu opened his lunch box and finds idlis in the box. He says " I am fed up of eating these idlis daily. If I find idlis in the box tomorrow, i will jump from the 20th floor and die".
Next the Bengali opens his lunch box and finds Fish in it and says, If I find fish in my lunch box tomorrow, I am going to jump from the 20th floor of this building and die".
Next the Sardarji opens his lunch box and finds Parathas in it and says "Mother promise, if I find parathas in my box tomorrow I am also going to jump from the 20th floor"
Next day the three friends meet in the lunch room for lunch. Mallu opens his lunch box and finds Idlis and promptly jumps from the 20th floor and dies.
The Bengali opens his lunch box and finds fish in it and jumps from the 20th floor and dies.
Sardarji opens his box and finds parathas and he also jumps
from the 20th floor and dies.
In the combined funeral held for all the three friends by their colleagues, the Mallu's widow says "I did not know he hated idlis so much. If not I would have packed something else for his lunch".
The Bengali's widow says "I did not know he hated fish so much. If not I would have packed something else for his lunch"
The sardarji's widow says "I do not understand what went wrong. My husband always prepared his own lunch!"
One is a Mallu, the second is a Bengali and the third is a Sardarji. Every day all the three meet in the lunch hall and have their lunch together.
One fine day-the Mallu opened his lunch box and finds idlis in the box. He says " I am fed up of eating these idlis daily. If I find idlis in the box tomorrow, i will jump from the 20th floor and die".
Next the Bengali opens his lunch box and finds Fish in it and says, If I find fish in my lunch box tomorrow, I am going to jump from the 20th floor of this building and die".
Next the Sardarji opens his lunch box and finds Parathas in it and says "Mother promise, if I find parathas in my box tomorrow I am also going to jump from the 20th floor"
Next day the three friends meet in the lunch room for lunch. Mallu opens his lunch box and finds Idlis and promptly jumps from the 20th floor and dies.
The Bengali opens his lunch box and finds fish in it and jumps from the 20th floor and dies.
Sardarji opens his box and finds parathas and he also jumps
from the 20th floor and dies.
In the combined funeral held for all the three friends by their colleagues, the Mallu's widow says "I did not know he hated idlis so much. If not I would have packed something else for his lunch".
The Bengali's widow says "I did not know he hated fish so much. If not I would have packed something else for his lunch"
The sardarji's widow says "I do not understand what went wrong. My husband always prepared his own lunch!"
Two sardarjis were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like anything.
So the other asked, "Why are you crying?"
The first one replied, "I came here for blood test"
Second one asked, "So? Are you afraid?"
First one replied, "No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger"
Hearing this the second one started crying. The first one was astonished and asked other, "Why are you crying?"
The other replied, "I have come for my urine test."
So the other asked, "Why are you crying?"
The first one replied, "I came here for blood test"
Second one asked, "So? Are you afraid?"
First one replied, "No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger"
Hearing this the second one started crying. The first one was astonished and asked other, "Why are you crying?"
The other replied, "I have come for my urine test."
A train suddenly deviated from the tracks and ran onto the nearby fields before returning on the tracks again. The passengers were horrified at this. At the
next railway station, the driver was caught and questioned. He was a sardar and explained that a man was standing on the tracks and he refused to budge.
The authorities asked him, "Sardarji, are you mad? Just to save one person, you put so many lives in danger. You should have overrun that person."
The sardar replied: "Exactly, that is what I was doing, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came very close."
next railway station, the driver was caught and questioned. He was a sardar and explained that a man was standing on the tracks and he refused to budge.
The authorities asked him, "Sardarji, are you mad? Just to save one person, you put so many lives in danger. You should have overrun that person."
The sardar replied: "Exactly, that is what I was doing, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came very close."
One Sardar was enjoying Sun on a Beach in UK.
A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing"
Sardar answered '" No I am Banta Singh"
Another Guy Came and asked the same Question.
Sardar answered " No No Me ! Banta Singh"
Third one came and asked the same
question, Sardar was totally annoyed and decided to
shift his place.
While walking he saw another Sardar
enjoying the Beach.
He went and asked him " Are you Relaxing?". The other Sardar was much educated and answered "Yes I am relaxing.
The Sardar slapped him on
his face and said "Idiot, they are all searching for you and you are sitting here"
A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing"
Sardar answered '" No I am Banta Singh"
Another Guy Came and asked the same Question.
Sardar answered " No No Me ! Banta Singh"
Third one came and asked the same
question, Sardar was totally annoyed and decided to
shift his place.
While walking he saw another Sardar
enjoying the Beach.
He went and asked him " Are you Relaxing?". The other Sardar was much educated and answered "Yes I am relaxing.
The Sardar slapped him on
his face and said "Idiot, they are all searching for you and you are sitting here"
One day Sardarji was driving his new car. Suddenly, he collided with a bicycle. The accident caused much damage to the bicycle and the guy was furious. Sardarji ran towards him mumbling apologies, but the man was not pacified.
He shouted at sardar got a stout stick and starting hammering it on the windshield. Sardarji was shocked and tried to take the stick from him, requesting him to stop. But the bicycle man (who was incidently very stout) got hold of the Sardarji and carried him ten meters away from his car. He drew a small circle near the road with the stick and asked Sardarji to stay inside and not move outside the circle, threatening him with his stout stick for better measure.
Now our Sardarji was not very brave at heart and coolly went to stand in the circle. The man goes back to what he had left in the middle and starts on the headlights. After this, he starts on the rearlights. As soon as he breaks the first one, he hears a faint chuckle from the Sardarji. He breaks the other one, now he could distinctly hear the Sardarji laugh slightly. Enraged, he goes to the Sardarji and asks him why he was laughing. Sardarji says that it was nothing.
He comes backs and resumes his assault on the poor car and as he goes on in this act, Sardarji's laughs become louder and louder. Enraged, the bicycle man increases his assault , but the laughs keep on increasing rather than decreasing.
At last, the bicycle man can't stop himself. He goes to the Sardar and taking him by the collar, asks him the reason for laughing. Our Sardar at first says it was nothing, but when the man starts getting really rough, he breaks down. He says "If I tell you, you will beat me". The bicycle man, now very curious, promises not to do anything if the Sardar tells him.
Satisfied about his safety, our Sardarji says "You know, while u were engaged there, I came out of the circle seventeen times."
He shouted at sardar got a stout stick and starting hammering it on the windshield. Sardarji was shocked and tried to take the stick from him, requesting him to stop. But the bicycle man (who was incidently very stout) got hold of the Sardarji and carried him ten meters away from his car. He drew a small circle near the road with the stick and asked Sardarji to stay inside and not move outside the circle, threatening him with his stout stick for better measure.
Now our Sardarji was not very brave at heart and coolly went to stand in the circle. The man goes back to what he had left in the middle and starts on the headlights. After this, he starts on the rearlights. As soon as he breaks the first one, he hears a faint chuckle from the Sardarji. He breaks the other one, now he could distinctly hear the Sardarji laugh slightly. Enraged, he goes to the Sardarji and asks him why he was laughing. Sardarji says that it was nothing.
He comes backs and resumes his assault on the poor car and as he goes on in this act, Sardarji's laughs become louder and louder. Enraged, the bicycle man increases his assault , but the laughs keep on increasing rather than decreasing.
At last, the bicycle man can't stop himself. He goes to the Sardar and taking him by the collar, asks him the reason for laughing. Our Sardar at first says it was nothing, but when the man starts getting really rough, he breaks down. He says "If I tell you, you will beat me". The bicycle man, now very curious, promises not to do anything if the Sardar tells him.
Satisfied about his safety, our Sardarji says "You know, while u were engaged there, I came out of the circle seventeen times."
One day Sardarji was driving his new car. Suddenly, he collided with a bicycle. The accident caused much damage to the bicycle and the guy was furious. Sardarji ran towards him mumbling apologies, but the man was not pacified.
He shouted at sardar got a stout stick and starting hammering it on the windshield. Sardarji was shocked and tried to take the stick from him, requesting him to stop. But the bicycle man (who was incidently very stout) got hold of the Sardarji and carried him ten meters away from his car. He drew a small circle near the road with the stick and asked Sardarji to stay inside and not move outside the circle, threatening him with his stout stick for better measure.
Now our Sardarji was not very brave at heart and coolly went to stand in the circle. The man goes back to what he had left in the middle and starts on the headlights. After this, he starts on the rearlights. As soon as he breaks the first one, he hears a faint chuckle from the Sardarji. He breaks the other one, now he could distinctly hear the Sardarji laugh slightly. Enraged, he goes to the Sardarji and asks him why he was laughing. Sardarji says that it was nothing.
He comes backs and resumes his assault on the poor car and as he goes on in this act, Sardarji's laughs become louder and louder. Enraged, the bicycle man increases his assault , but the laughs keep on increasing rather than decreasing.
At last, the bicycle man can't stop himself. He goes to the Sardar and taking him by the collar, asks him the reason for laughing. Our Sardar at first says it was nothing, but when the man starts getting really rough, he breaks down. He says "If I tell you, you will beat me". The bicycle man, now very curious, promises not to do anything if the Sardar tells him.
Satisfied about his safety, our Sardarji says "You know, while u were engaged there, I came out of the circle seventeen times."
He shouted at sardar got a stout stick and starting hammering it on the windshield. Sardarji was shocked and tried to take the stick from him, requesting him to stop. But the bicycle man (who was incidently very stout) got hold of the Sardarji and carried him ten meters away from his car. He drew a small circle near the road with the stick and asked Sardarji to stay inside and not move outside the circle, threatening him with his stout stick for better measure.
Now our Sardarji was not very brave at heart and coolly went to stand in the circle. The man goes back to what he had left in the middle and starts on the headlights. After this, he starts on the rearlights. As soon as he breaks the first one, he hears a faint chuckle from the Sardarji. He breaks the other one, now he could distinctly hear the Sardarji laugh slightly. Enraged, he goes to the Sardarji and asks him why he was laughing. Sardarji says that it was nothing.
He comes backs and resumes his assault on the poor car and as he goes on in this act, Sardarji's laughs become louder and louder. Enraged, the bicycle man increases his assault , but the laughs keep on increasing rather than decreasing.
At last, the bicycle man can't stop himself. He goes to the Sardar and taking him by the collar, asks him the reason for laughing. Our Sardar at first says it was nothing, but when the man starts getting really rough, he breaks down. He says "If I tell you, you will beat me". The bicycle man, now very curious, promises not to do anything if the Sardar tells him.
Satisfied about his safety, our Sardarji says "You know, while u were engaged there, I came out of the circle seventeen times."
Our staff has completed the 18 months of work on time and on budget. We have gone through every line of code in every program in every system.
We have analyzed all databases, all data files, including backups and historic archives, and modified all data to reflect the change. We are proud to report that we have completed the "Y-to-K" date change mission, and have now implemented all changes to all programs and all data to reflect your new standards:
Januark, Februark, March, April, Mak, June, Julk, August, September, October, November, December
As well as:
Sundak, Mondak, Tuesdak, Wednesdak, Thursdak, Fridak, Saturdak
I trust that this is satisfactory, because to be honest, none of this Y to K problem has made any sense to me. But I understand it is a globalproblem, and our team is glad to help in any way possible.
And what does the year 2000 have to do with it? Speaking of which, what do you think We ought to do next year when the two digit year rolls over from 99 to 00? We'll await your direction.
We have analyzed all databases, all data files, including backups and historic archives, and modified all data to reflect the change. We are proud to report that we have completed the "Y-to-K" date change mission, and have now implemented all changes to all programs and all data to reflect your new standards:
Januark, Februark, March, April, Mak, June, Julk, August, September, October, November, December
As well as:
Sundak, Mondak, Tuesdak, Wednesdak, Thursdak, Fridak, Saturdak
I trust that this is satisfactory, because to be honest, none of this Y to K problem has made any sense to me. But I understand it is a globalproblem, and our team is glad to help in any way possible.
And what does the year 2000 have to do with it? Speaking of which, what do you think We ought to do next year when the two digit year rolls over from 99 to 00? We'll await your direction.
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Funny Jokes: Sardar Joke
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Sardar complained to his friend about his wife "My wife never agrees with anything I say. And we have been married for six years."
Mrs Sardar (Rajsi) intervened, "Not six we have been married for seven years!"
psychology
man-women
animal
engineering
help-desk
teacher
politician
police
others
doctor
work
husband
Mexican
parrot
students
aeroplane
america
pirate
parents
marriage
mother-in-law
women
chinese
son-in-law
english
office
president
love
bar
birds
girl-friend
brother-sister
Atheist
heaven-hell
stranger
Intellectual
.
Funny Jokes: Sardar Joke
Next Joke: Go Next >> Previous Joke: << Go Prev
Sardar complained to his friend about his wife "My wife never agrees with anything I say. And we have been married for six years."
Mrs Sardar (Rajsi) intervened, "Not six we have been married for seven years!"
Sardar joins the suicide bomber squad. So when he is given a mission to suicide in the enemies camp his leader supply him a lot of weapons and bombs stacked to his body and mobile for communications.
He lands up in the enemy's camp, called his boss: Sir, there are 2 enemies soldier, can I suicide now?
Leader: No, not for two, wait till you see more soldiers.
Sardar: Sir now there are 25 can I do it now?
Boss: Wait for more.
Sardar: Sir, now I am in a midst of 100 soldiers, can I suicide now?
Boss: Yes, go ahead, you will be a martyr, don't worry about your family, we will look after.
Sardar pulls his knife and stabs himself in his chest.!!!
He lands up in the enemy's camp, called his boss: Sir, there are 2 enemies soldier, can I suicide now?
Leader: No, not for two, wait till you see more soldiers.
Sardar: Sir now there are 25 can I do it now?
Boss: Wait for more.
Sardar: Sir, now I am in a midst of 100 soldiers, can I suicide now?
Boss: Yes, go ahead, you will be a martyr, don't worry about your family, we will look after.
Sardar pulls his knife and stabs himself in his chest.!!!
santa-singh
old-age
psychology
man-women
animal
engineering
help-desk
teacher
politician
police
others
doctor
work
husband
Mexican
parrot
students
aeroplane
america
pirate
parents
marriage
mother-in-law
women
chinese
son-in-law
english
office
president
love
bar
birds
girl-friend
brother-sister
Atheist
heaven-hell
stranger
Intellectual
.
Funny Jokes: Sardar Joke
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Sardar: Can I know my mobile bill, please?
Call centre girl: Sir,just dial *123# to know your current bill status.
Sardar: (He got angry and..)You stupid...
Call centre girl:Sir,I'm sorry, anything wrong?
Sardar: I'm not asking my current bill.I'm asking my mobile bill.. Don't be a fool. Be wise like me.
Call centre girl: ???!!!
old-age
psychology
man-women
animal
engineering
help-desk
teacher
politician
police
others
doctor
work
husband
Mexican
parrot
students
aeroplane
america
pirate
parents
marriage
mother-in-law
women
chinese
son-in-law
english
office
president
love
bar
birds
girl-friend
brother-sister
Atheist
heaven-hell
stranger
Intellectual
.
Funny Jokes: Sardar Joke
Next Joke: Go Next >> Previous Joke: << Go Prev
Sardar: Can I know my mobile bill, please?
Call centre girl: Sir,just dial *123# to know your current bill status.
Sardar: (He got angry and..)You stupid...
Call centre girl:Sir,I'm sorry, anything wrong?
Sardar: I'm not asking my current bill.I'm asking my mobile bill.. Don't be a fool. Be wise like me.
Call centre girl: ???!!!
Sardar 1:If you tell me what's there in my basket, I'll give you all the EGGS in it.
Sardar 2: (Thinking...)
Sardar 1:And if you tell me how many eggs are there, I'll give you all the 7 EGGS!!
Sardar 2: (Thinking...)
Sardar 1:And again if you tell me which bird's eggs these are, the HEN is also yours....
Sardar 2: Your questions are too tough...So give me a clue or hint???
Sardar 1:!!!!
Sardar 2: (Thinking...)
Sardar 1:And if you tell me how many eggs are there, I'll give you all the 7 EGGS!!
Sardar 2: (Thinking...)
Sardar 1:And again if you tell me which bird's eggs these are, the HEN is also yours....
Sardar 2: Your questions are too tough...So give me a clue or hint???
Sardar 1:!!!!
sardar returns from London. He calls his wife and asks her, "Do I look like a foreigner?"
She says no.
The answer angers him. "Look carefully, do I look like a foreigner?"
She again replies in the negative. By now the sardar is fuming.
He yells: "Come close and see, do I look like a foreigner?"
The wife says: "No."
The sardar who is seething with rage says: "All those women in London were fools. Every time I went out they would say: `Look a foreigner`."
She says no.
The answer angers him. "Look carefully, do I look like a foreigner?"
She again replies in the negative. By now the sardar is fuming.
He yells: "Come close and see, do I look like a foreigner?"
The wife says: "No."
The sardar who is seething with rage says: "All those women in London were fools. Every time I went out they would say: `Look a foreigner`."
In a Test between India and Australia, a fiery Lee was sending quivers down the Indian spine. The new batsman, our sardar, walked slowly to the crease, not feeling unlike a lamb at the slaughter house.
As Lee thundered in, suddenly sardar stood up in the crease, and signalled that he wanted the sight screen adjusted. Adjustments were made and Lee was ready to come in again.
Once again, in the middle of his run-up, sardar found something disturbing in the sight screen.
Indeed, this went on a few times before the irritated umpire, Steve Bucknor walked up to the batsman and enquired, "Where do you want the sight screen, for God`s sake?"
Santa asked, with an ounce of fear, "Could I have it between Lee and me?"!!!
As Lee thundered in, suddenly sardar stood up in the crease, and signalled that he wanted the sight screen adjusted. Adjustments were made and Lee was ready to come in again.
Once again, in the middle of his run-up, sardar found something disturbing in the sight screen.
Indeed, this went on a few times before the irritated umpire, Steve Bucknor walked up to the batsman and enquired, "Where do you want the sight screen, for God`s sake?"
Santa asked, with an ounce of fear, "Could I have it between Lee and me?"!!!