Management Lessons One Two Three
Lesson Number One
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?The crow answered: Sure, why not. So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson? To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree, sighed the turkey, but I havent got the energy.Well, why dont you nibble on some of my droppings? replied the bull. They packed with nutrients. The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Management Lesson? Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lesson Number Three
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and ame to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird unde the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!
Management Lesson?
1) Not everyone who drops **** on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of **** is your friend.
3) And when you are in deep ****, keep your mouth shut!
Communication in the work place (Funny)
The following humorously depicts what happens when a message is passed on by people to people; how important it is to be clear and precise whilst communicating in the corporate world...
CORPORATE COMMUNICATION???
From: Managing Director
To: Vice President
Tomorrow morning there will be a total eclipse of the sun at nine o'clock. This is something which we cannot see everyday. So let all employees line up outside, in their best clothes to watch it. To mark the occasion of this rare occurrence ,I will personally explain the phenomenon to them .If it is raining we will not be able to see it very well and in that case the employees should assemble in the Canteen.
From : Vice President
To : General Manager
By order of the Managing Director, there will be a total eclipse of the sun at nine o'clock tomorrow morning. If it is raining we will not be able to see it in our best clothes, on the site. In this case the disappearance of the sun will be followed through in the canteen. This is something we cannot see happening everyday."
From: General Managers
To: Industry Managers
By order of the Managing Director, we shall follow the disappearance of the sun in our best clothes, in the canteen at nine o' clock tomorrow morning. The Managing Director will tell us whether it is going to rain. This is something which we cannot see happen everyday."
From : Industry Managers
To : Location heads
If it is raining in the canteen tomorrow morning, which is something that we cannot see happen everyday ,the Managing Director in his best clothes, will disappear at nine o'clock."
From: Location heads
To: Marketing Executives
Tomorrow morning at nine o'clock, the Managing Director will disappear. It's a pity that we can't see this happen everyday.
So friends, the next time you are communicating, be careful, Your Communication can Make it or Break it.
Lesson Number One
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?The crow answered: Sure, why not. So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson? To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Number Two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree, sighed the turkey, but I havent got the energy.Well, why dont you nibble on some of my droppings? replied the bull. They packed with nutrients. The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Management Lesson? Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
Lesson Number Three
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and ame to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird unde the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!
Management Lesson?
1) Not everyone who drops **** on you is your enemy.
2) Not everyone who gets you out of **** is your friend.
3) And when you are in deep ****, keep your mouth shut!
Communication in the work place (Funny)
The following humorously depicts what happens when a message is passed on by people to people; how important it is to be clear and precise whilst communicating in the corporate world...
CORPORATE COMMUNICATION???
From: Managing Director
To: Vice President
Tomorrow morning there will be a total eclipse of the sun at nine o'clock. This is something which we cannot see everyday. So let all employees line up outside, in their best clothes to watch it. To mark the occasion of this rare occurrence ,I will personally explain the phenomenon to them .If it is raining we will not be able to see it very well and in that case the employees should assemble in the Canteen.
From : Vice President
To : General Manager
By order of the Managing Director, there will be a total eclipse of the sun at nine o'clock tomorrow morning. If it is raining we will not be able to see it in our best clothes, on the site. In this case the disappearance of the sun will be followed through in the canteen. This is something we cannot see happening everyday."
From: General Managers
To: Industry Managers
By order of the Managing Director, we shall follow the disappearance of the sun in our best clothes, in the canteen at nine o' clock tomorrow morning. The Managing Director will tell us whether it is going to rain. This is something which we cannot see happen everyday."
From : Industry Managers
To : Location heads
If it is raining in the canteen tomorrow morning, which is something that we cannot see happen everyday ,the Managing Director in his best clothes, will disappear at nine o'clock."
From: Location heads
To: Marketing Executives
Tomorrow morning at nine o'clock, the Managing Director will disappear. It's a pity that we can't see this happen everyday.
So friends, the next time you are communicating, be careful, Your Communication can Make it or Break it.