Passive communication is a form of communication where the sender is unable to convey his thoughts or views out of fear of confrontation by others. [/i]
Self esteem is defined as an individual’s view of his own worth and this can be root cause of the above problem because of which they feel they aren’t worthy of being expressed. This further builds up emotional conflicts and thus their self-esteem falls further subsequently. Passive communicators may have an opinion, but refuse to share it out of fear for what could happen
The habit of acceptance and trying to please others when deep rooted converts into a form of passive communication where the individual hides his opinions to please others involved.[/i][/b]
Individual who exhibit passive communication tend to speak in a soft and apologetic manner. They fail to vouch or assert for themselves and allow others to interfere on their rights and opinions. They also do not express their feelings, views and needs on their own. Such individuals also establish very poor eye contact and improper body language and postures. They also possess the following traits:
Exhibits shyness
Displays anxiety and nervousness
Have feelings of worthlessness
Believes others' wants and needs are more important than his/her own
Finds it difficult to make decisions for self
Often cannot say no or feels guilty about saying no
Assumes others will know what's best for him/her
Keeps negative feelings inside
Frequently sends mixed messages
Confused and frustrated all the time
Others feel frustrated working with you
Indirect and shy
The outcome is somewhat avoided because of confusion.
Busy when others need help or in need have help
Undermines the other person by making subtle comments
The one who starts rumors and gives false information
Letting air out of tires, destroying work left at someone’s station, messing up a desk, or mixing up materials are all nasty ways of expressing anger
Transforming the passive communication is important for everyone in the workplace so that the negative effect of passive communication fades away and one becomes capable enough of putting forward his/her views openly. Once you change your attitude you can feel the pleasure of the following:
It helps us feel good about ourselves and others
It leads to the development of mutual respect with others
It increases our self-esteem
It helps us achieve our goals
It minimizes hurting and alienating other people
It reduces anxiety
It protects us from being taken advantage of by others
It enables us to make decisions and free choices in life
It enables us to express, both verbally and non-verbally, a wide range of feelings and thoughts, both positive and negative
Along with the above you also enjoy the substantial benefits that get along to you once you implement the above in your life.
Assertiveness does not always guarantee that you get what you want and need, but under most circumstances it is still most appropriate and preferable.
Getting assertive is not that difficult also, you just need courage and confidence to follow your thoughts and also the courage to face your own close people because you change your attitude suddenly to such a great extent there are people to pull you down or make fun of you. But whatever are the consequences or happenings once you let out that negativity and make your mind for the positive you won’t confront problems any more. Taking into consideration the above you might also get to see benefits and impact of your behaviour on others.
You can also take the following tips to be assertive in your behaviour
First of all get to know your style
Also use I for you in your communication
Don’t always say yes to every work that comes to your table, build the guts to say NO
Try and avoid getting emotional.
Another point of discussion pops in is about the doubt of being assertive and aggressive. The attitude behaviour of all the three differs.
Taking an example over here depicting the behaviour all 3 traits under one situation could be featured as below:
Passive Behavior: Values self less than others
Aggressive Behavior: Values self more than others
Assertive Behavior: Values self equal to others
The comments of all the three are depicted above. However the benefits of all can be analyzed by self and you can choose your path of behaviour having view from all sides of situation.