Getting Feedback Is More Important Than Celebrating Success
Almost heard many times in my life, whatever you do take feedback from the ones you know. The reason behind the same that I could evaluate is, whatever you do and if you succeed in the same you never encounter with the hidden flaws which else if it could have overcome the success could be much more. Hence the getting a rebuttal is essential, helps you gain everything. It is also important to recognize the audience from whom you are taking the rebuttal. Receiving feedback requires skill. Advice might not eliminate apprehension, defensiveness and anger; it certainly will improve the likelihood that you will do more than just hear feedback
SARA is an acrostic that describes the four steps people sometimes go through when receiving feedback:
Surprise
Anger
Rationalization
Acceptance
While receiving feedback be open minded, be it a formal or informal setting. Without an open mind, none of the rest of these steps will make any difference at all.
Get to know things that could have made the concept much better, take into consideration the lessons you learn from it. Regardless, make it your goal to always look for the golden nugget inside of the feedback. Rather than getting upset, choose to ask some questions for getting your doubts clarified. Feedback is often given about past performance. You can`t change the past, but you can change the future. At some point in the conversation ask them for their advice. Maybe something like:
Sometimes people are defensive from the start, or get that way as soon as they hear something negative. If comments are framed as a personal attack, you can choose to suspend judgment and apply the other ideas on the list.
Make sure your intentions are pure and also make the audience feel the same, Always say thank you. Being grateful is one way you can show your gratitude towards the one giving you the valuable feedback
Always remember that how you respond to any feedback is completely in your control. Take that control if you want to gain more value from any feedback you receive.
Practice all the skills of an effective listener that encourage the other person to talk.
Hear to whatever the feedback provider is saying, they’ll appreciate you for patience and listening to them.
Just because a person gives you feedback, doesn't mean their feedback is right. Analyses of the same should be done by you.
Check with others to determine the reliability of the feedback
Even your manager or supervisor finds providing feedback scary. They never know how the person receiving feedback is going to react.
If you find yourself becoming defensive or hostile, practice stress management techniques such as taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.
Focusing on understanding the feedback by questioning and restating usually defuses any feelings you have of hostility or anger.
If you really disagree, are angry or upset, and want to dissuade the other person of their opinion, wait until your emotions are under control to reopen the discussion.
Different styles of feedback given
Negative/Closed Style
Defensive: defends personal actions, frequently objects to feedback given.
Attacking: verbally attacks the feedback giver, and turns the table.
Denies: refutes the accuracy or fairness of the feedback.
Disrespectful: devalues the speaker, what the speaker is saying, or the speaker's right to give feedback.
Closed: ignores the feedback, listening blankly without interest.
Inactive listening: makes no attempt to "hear" or understand the meaning of the feedback.
Rationalizing: finds explanations for the feedback that dissolve any personal responsibility.
Patronizing: listens, but shows little interest.
Superficial: listens and agrees, but gives the impression that the feedback will have little actual effect.
Positive/Open Style
Open: listens without frequent interruption or objections.
Responsive: willing to hear what's being said without turning the table.
Accepting: accepts the feedback, without denial.
Respectful: recognizes the value of what is being said and the speaker's right to say it.
Engaged: interacts appropriately with the speaker, asking for clarification when needed.
Active listening: listens carefully and tries to understand the meaning of the feedback.
Thoughtful: tries to understand the personal behavior that has led to the feedback.
Interested: is genuinely interested in getting feedback.
Sincere: genuinely wants to make personal changes if appropriate.
Almost heard many times in my life, whatever you do take feedback from the ones you know. The reason behind the same that I could evaluate is, whatever you do and if you succeed in the same you never encounter with the hidden flaws which else if it could have overcome the success could be much more. Hence the getting a rebuttal is essential, helps you gain everything. It is also important to recognize the audience from whom you are taking the rebuttal. Receiving feedback requires skill. Advice might not eliminate apprehension, defensiveness and anger; it certainly will improve the likelihood that you will do more than just hear feedback
SARA is an acrostic that describes the four steps people sometimes go through when receiving feedback:
Surprise
Anger
Rationalization
Acceptance
While receiving feedback be open minded, be it a formal or informal setting. Without an open mind, none of the rest of these steps will make any difference at all.
Get to know things that could have made the concept much better, take into consideration the lessons you learn from it. Regardless, make it your goal to always look for the golden nugget inside of the feedback. Rather than getting upset, choose to ask some questions for getting your doubts clarified. Feedback is often given about past performance. You can`t change the past, but you can change the future. At some point in the conversation ask them for their advice. Maybe something like:
Sometimes people are defensive from the start, or get that way as soon as they hear something negative. If comments are framed as a personal attack, you can choose to suspend judgment and apply the other ideas on the list.
Make sure your intentions are pure and also make the audience feel the same, Always say thank you. Being grateful is one way you can show your gratitude towards the one giving you the valuable feedback
Always remember that how you respond to any feedback is completely in your control. Take that control if you want to gain more value from any feedback you receive.
Practice all the skills of an effective listener that encourage the other person to talk.
Hear to whatever the feedback provider is saying, they’ll appreciate you for patience and listening to them.
Just because a person gives you feedback, doesn't mean their feedback is right. Analyses of the same should be done by you.
Check with others to determine the reliability of the feedback
Even your manager or supervisor finds providing feedback scary. They never know how the person receiving feedback is going to react.
If you find yourself becoming defensive or hostile, practice stress management techniques such as taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.
Focusing on understanding the feedback by questioning and restating usually defuses any feelings you have of hostility or anger.
If you really disagree, are angry or upset, and want to dissuade the other person of their opinion, wait until your emotions are under control to reopen the discussion.
Different styles of feedback given
Negative/Closed Style
Defensive: defends personal actions, frequently objects to feedback given.
Attacking: verbally attacks the feedback giver, and turns the table.
Denies: refutes the accuracy or fairness of the feedback.
Disrespectful: devalues the speaker, what the speaker is saying, or the speaker's right to give feedback.
Closed: ignores the feedback, listening blankly without interest.
Inactive listening: makes no attempt to "hear" or understand the meaning of the feedback.
Rationalizing: finds explanations for the feedback that dissolve any personal responsibility.
Patronizing: listens, but shows little interest.
Superficial: listens and agrees, but gives the impression that the feedback will have little actual effect.
Positive/Open Style
Open: listens without frequent interruption or objections.
Responsive: willing to hear what's being said without turning the table.
Accepting: accepts the feedback, without denial.
Respectful: recognizes the value of what is being said and the speaker's right to say it.
Engaged: interacts appropriately with the speaker, asking for clarification when needed.
Active listening: listens carefully and tries to understand the meaning of the feedback.
Thoughtful: tries to understand the personal behavior that has led to the feedback.
Interested: is genuinely interested in getting feedback.
Sincere: genuinely wants to make personal changes if appropriate.