Funny Jokes Collection

Santa Singh while riding a cycle suddenly hit a girl!
The girl shouted: Ghanti nahi maar sakta tha!!!
Santa: Poori cycle to maar di ab ghanti alag se maroon??!!!
 
Santa : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying.... When Banta asked what he was doing.... He replied... Oye!! Higher Studies Yaar...!!!
 
Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.
 
Interviewer : When is your birthday.
Sardarjee : 13th Oct.
Interviewer : which year ?
sardarjee : Oye Ullu ke patte : Every year.
 
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Don't worry, I have a one more.
 
Sardarji gets ready ,wears tie, coat ,goes out, climbs tree, sits on the branch regularly. A man asks why he does this. Sardarji:"I've been promoted as branch manager."
 
Sardar comes back 2 his car & finds a note saying "Parking Fine"

He writes a note and sticks it 2 pole "Thanks 4 d complement"
 
How do you recognize a Sardar in School?

He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.
 
Q3. Harbhajan ask's Kumble to bring a Pepsi... Kumble brings a bottle of Pepsi but goes directly to Shehwag.? Why ?? Why ??
Ans:- Shehwag is an opener
 
Once, two Sardars were feeling bored and decided to play a few games

of chess to pass the time.

They were doing this for some time, when two more sardar friends

dropped by. Seeing them play chess, they said -

“Come on guys, we are feeling bored too. Let us play doubles!”
 
Once a Sardarji went to the city of Mumbai for the first time to meet his father. His father had asked him to keep walking in the direction of the sunrise until he eventually reached hishouse. Since, the Sardarji was new to the city he decided to ask a passerby the direction in which the sun rose in Mumbai - east, west, north or south?The passerby who was also a Sardarji thought for some time and then said, “Main bhi is sheher mein naya aaya hoon!” ( I am also new in this city!)
 
One day an employee sends a letter to his boss to increase his salary!!!


Dear Bo$$
In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing mo$t de$perately. I think you $hould be under$tanding of the need$ of u$ worker$ who have given $o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company.
I am $ure you will gue$$ what I mean and re$pond $oon.
Your$ $incerely,
Norman $oh



Guess what was the response!!!! !




The next day, the employee received this letter of reply:

Dear NOrman,
I kNOw you have been working very hard. NOwadays, NOthing much has changed. You must have NOticed that our company is NOt doing NOticeably well as yet.
NOw the newspaper are saying the world`s leading ecoNOmists are NOt sure if the United States may go into aNOther recession. After the NOvember presidential elections things may turn bad.
I have NOthing more to add NOw. You kNOw what I mean.
Yours truly,
Manager
 
This was said by Mariah Carey

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
 
On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,"
--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.
 
Wife: I hate the beggar who came yesterday!

Husband: Why??

Wife: I gave him food yesterday & today he gifted me a book "How to Cook"!!
 
Wht is similarity between Bill gates n me?

Don't know??

He never comes 2 my house and I never go 2 his house

EGO PROBLEMS U KNOW...
 
A man calls his wife through an !dea mobile.

But the call goes to another woman.

They loved & got married.

Moral: an !dea can change ur wife
 
Bin Laden's son was studying in an American school.

Teacher asked him, " I have 4 apples, how can I share it among 5 children"

He answerd, "KILL ONE"
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top