Body Language TO Manage Before Anything
Don’t cross your arms or legs
You have probably already heard you shouldn’t cross your arms as it might make you seem defensive or guarded.
Have eye contact, but don’t stare
If there are several people you are talking to, give them all some eye contact to create a better connection and see if they are listening. Keeping too much eye-contact might creep people out.
Giving no eye-contact might make you seem insecure. If you are not used to keeping eye-contact it might feel a little hard or scary in the beginning but keep working on it and you’ll get used to it.
Don’t be afraid to take up some space – Taking up space by for example sitting or standing with your legs apart a bit signals self-confidence and that you are comfortable in your own skin.
Relax your shoulders
When you feel tense it’s easily winds up as tension in your shoulders. They might move up and forward a bit. Try to relax.
Try to loosen up by shaking the shoulders a bit and move them back slightly.
Don’t slouch, sit up straight
Smile and laugh
Lighten up, don’t take yourself too seriously. Relax a bit, smile and laugh when someone says something funny.
People will be a lot more inclined to listen to you if you seem to be a positive person.
But don’t be the first to laugh at your own jokes, it makes you seem nervous and needy.
Smile when you are introduced to someone but don’t keep a smile plastered on your face, you’ll seem insincere.
Don’t touch your face
Keep you head up
Don’t keep your eyes on the ground, it might make you seem insecure and a bit lost.
Keep your head up straight and your eyes towards the horizon.
Slow down a bit – this goes for many things. Walking slower not only makes you seem more calm and confident, it will also make you feel less stressed.
If someone addresses you, don’t snap you’re neck in their direction, turn it a bit more slowly instead.
Lower your drink – don’t hold your drink in front of your chest. In fact, don’t hold anything in front of your heart as it will make you seem guarded and distant. Lower it and hold it beside your leg instead.
Your spine ends in the back of your head. Keep you whole spine straight and aligned for better posture
Don’t stand too close –one of the things we learned from Seinfeld is that everybody gets weirded out by a close-talker. Let people have their personal space, don’t invade it.
To make the connection better you can try a bit of proactive mirroring. If he leans forward, you might lean forward. If she holds her hands on her thighs, you might do the same. But don’t react instantly and don’t mirror every change in body language. Then weirdness will ensue.
Keep a good attitude – last but not least, keep a positive, open and relaxed attitude. How you feel will come through in your body language and can make a major difference. For information on how make yourself feel better read 10 ways to change how you feel and for relaxation try A very simple way to feel relaxed for 24 hours.