Police blame drunk driving on death of teen girl as car rolls in the ditch (Kitchener

The majority of vehicle accidents are caused by sober drivers who had nothing to drink. Clearly this shows that alcohol reduces accidents. We need a law requiring people to drink before driving to reduce accidents. Maybe an interlock ignition device where you have to blow into it first. If there is no alcohol on your breath, it won't let you turn on the ignition. The former Soviet Union used to subsidize vodka sales. We could do the same. Eliminate taxes on alcohol, replace them with subsidies. Have a legal holiday of St. Patrick's Day and observe it every week. Obama could appoint an alcohol czar, who would cite people for being sober. Make it a misdemeanor to be sober in public. A felony for aggravated sobriety. Set up checkpoints to catch sober people. Make them attend SA meetings. Hi, my name is George, I'm a soberholic. But I've been wet for three years now (pause for applause) Not a day gone by without at least 5 drinks (more applause). It would help stimulate the economy too. I think there's a pun in there somewhere.
 
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