JOKES___JOKES

[prabhatpastor]

Don't blame.........

A preacher and an atheistic barber were once walking through the city slums. Said the barber to the preacher: "This is why I cannot believe in a God of love. If God was so kind as you say, He would not permit all this poverty, disease, and squalor. He would not allow these poor bums to be addicted to dope and other character-destroying habits. No, I cannot believe in a God who permits these things."

The minister was silent until they met a man who was especially unkempt and filthy. His hair was hanging down his neck and he had a half-inch of stubble on his face. Said the minister: "You must not be a very good barber because you wouldn't permit a man like that to continue living in this neighborhood without a haircut and shave." Indignantly the barber answered: "Why blame me for that man's condition? I can't help it that he is like that. He has never come in my shop; I could fix him up and make him look like a gentleman!"

Giving the barber a penetrating look, the minister said: "Then don't blame God for allowing the people to continue in their evil ways, when He is constantly inviting them to come and be saved."
Reply With Quote

 

[prabhatpastor]

A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table. She said, 'For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.

The wife answered, 'Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.'

The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands.

The husband thought for a moment: 'Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again.

I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me.'

The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish.

So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof!... the husband became 92 years old.

The moral of this story: Men who are ungrateful should remember.... fairies are female too!

 

[prabhatpastor]

Talking Jokes!!!
Boy-I’m not rich like Rahul,
I don’t even have a big car like Rahul,
but I really Luv U!
Girl: I luv u too,
but tell me more about Rahul.

**************

It takes thousand workers 2 build a castle,
Million soldiers 2 protect a country,
but just One woman 2 make a Happy Home!
Let’s Thank... KAAMWALI BAI

**************

Angry boss: Tumne kabhi Ullu dekha hai?
Executive (sar jhukate hue): Nahin sir.
Boss: Niche kya dekh rahe ho ? Meri taraf dekho.

**************

Q: Agar do pipal ke Pedon ko ek rassi se
bandh diya jaye to us rassi ko kya kahenge?
A: Us rassi ko bolengey NOKIA - Connecting pipal

**************

Ek yug tha jab log apne ghar ke dwar pe
likhte the: ATITHI DEVO BHAVA

Phir likha: SHUBH LABH
Phir likhne lage: U R WELCOME
Aur ab likhte hain: KUTTON SE SAVDHAN

 

[prabhatpastor]

What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.

If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life.
If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.

Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.

 

[prabhatpastor]

A BIHARI WAS WORKING IN MUMBAI, AND DID NOT MEET HIS wife for four (4) years while his wife was in Patna (Bihar). At the end of 4 years he distributed sweets to his
colleagues in office stating that his wife had delivered a son.

His colleagues were quite shocked and they asked how this "Happy event" happened when he had not seen his wife for four years...

The man said it is common in Bihar that neighbours take care of the wife when men are away.

The colleagues asked him, "What name will you give to the son?"

The man explained, "If its the second neighbour who has taken care,then the name would be "DWIVEDI";
If it is the third neighbour then it would be "TRIVEDI",
If it is the fourth neighbour then it would be "CHATURVEDI" ;
If its the fifth neighbour then it would be "PANDEY"...

After listening to this, questions followed.
What if it is a mixture of neighbours?
"Then the boy would be named "MISHRA"...

And what if the wife is too shy to tell
the name of the neighbour?
Then it would be "SHARMA"...

But what if she refuses to divulge the name of the neighbour?
Then the name of the child would be "GUPTA"...

If she does not remember the name then?
"It is YAAD-AV"

But who knows whether the child resulted from a rape?
Then it will be named "DOSHI"...

Finally, if the child happened because of wife's burning desire?
Then he will be named "JOSHI"...

And if the whole country had made efforts for the happy arrival?....