Mental case..
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while
they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped
into the deep end.
He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly
jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom, pulled Jim out and brought
him to his room.
When the hospital director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she
immediately ordered that Edna be discharged from the hospital
because she now considered Edna to be mentally stable.
She went to Edna and said, "I have some good news and some bad
news."
The good news is that you're being discharged because you responded
so rationally to a crisis. By jumping in the pool to save the life of
another patient, you displayed sound mindedness.
The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in
his bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so
sorry, but he's dead.
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself. I put him there to dry.
How soon can I go home?
My Daughter or My Money - your reward!
Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day he decides to throw a huge party, and during the party he announces, "My dear guests . . . I have a proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars or my daughter to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge alive!"
As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a large splash!! There was one guy in the pool swimming with all he could and screaming out of fear. The crowd cheered him on as he kept stroking as though he was running for his life. Finally, he made it to the other side with only a torn shirt and some minor injuries. The millionaire was impressed.
He said, "My boy that was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it could be done! Well I must keep my end of the bargain. Do you want my daughter or the one million dollars?"
The guy says, "Listen, I don't want your money, nor do I want your daughter! I want the person who pushed me in that water!"
Hot Revenge
Two missionaries in Africa were apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, built a huge fire under it, and left them there.
A few minutes later, one of the missionaries started to laugh uncontrollably.
The other missionary couldn't believe it! He said, ''What's wrong with you? We're being boiled alive! They're gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?''
The other missionary replied, ''I just peed in the soup!''
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while
they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped
into the deep end.
He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly
jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom, pulled Jim out and brought
him to his room.
When the hospital director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she
immediately ordered that Edna be discharged from the hospital
because she now considered Edna to be mentally stable.
She went to Edna and said, "I have some good news and some bad
news."
The good news is that you're being discharged because you responded
so rationally to a crisis. By jumping in the pool to save the life of
another patient, you displayed sound mindedness.
The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in
his bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so
sorry, but he's dead.
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself. I put him there to dry.
How soon can I go home?
My Daughter or My Money - your reward!
Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day he decides to throw a huge party, and during the party he announces, "My dear guests . . . I have a proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars or my daughter to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge alive!"
As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a large splash!! There was one guy in the pool swimming with all he could and screaming out of fear. The crowd cheered him on as he kept stroking as though he was running for his life. Finally, he made it to the other side with only a torn shirt and some minor injuries. The millionaire was impressed.
He said, "My boy that was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it could be done! Well I must keep my end of the bargain. Do you want my daughter or the one million dollars?"
The guy says, "Listen, I don't want your money, nor do I want your daughter! I want the person who pushed me in that water!"
Hot Revenge
Two missionaries in Africa were apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, built a huge fire under it, and left them there.
A few minutes later, one of the missionaries started to laugh uncontrollably.
The other missionary couldn't believe it! He said, ''What's wrong with you? We're being boiled alive! They're gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?''
The other missionary replied, ''I just peed in the soup!''
