Ananya is disappointed. In spite of her displaying great technical knowledge, her interviewers seemed unimpressed. Meenakshi, her college pal could easily tell her what might have gone wrong – diffident body language. What exactly is body language (BL)? It is essentially about:
Eye contact –
to signal interest, trust, integrity , attentiveness
Facial expressions –
to convey a gamut of mind-states like happiness, surprise, skepticism, disappointment
Posture –
to indicate attentiveness or ease, anxiety or a relaxed mental frame
Gestures –
to display a range of messages including open-mindedness , conviction, confidence, caution or ambiguity
Touch –
to show camaraderie, encouragement , support or friendliness “Space bubble” (i.e. the comfortable distance that we like to maintain around ourselves, while interacting with others) – to indicate our level of comfort with those around
Para language –
pitch, tone, inflection – to communicate various mind states such as enthusiasm, passion, anguish, boredom
Ideal BL for an interview
Since BL mirrors the mind, our posture and gestures will reflect our state of mind. It is great to walk in with a smile, maintain eye contact and offer a firm handshake.
As you walk in...
Eye contact, expression– Keep the eye contact direct. Match it with a smiling countenance and a direct gaze to convey confidence. Remember to maintain eye contact with all the interviewers, while answering a question, although you may choose to focus more on the questioner than on the others. Posture – Shoulders back, head high and spine straight, works well.
Choice of seating–
If faced with a choice of more than one seating option, opt for either a chair that is at a non-confrontational angle to the interviewer’s chair (i.e. at right angles to it, not facing it directly), or, choose the central chair of a trio of chairs.
As the interview proceeds...
Sit erect, without slouching. Don’t go to the other extreme either – sitting perched on the edge of the seat indicates anxiety. If crossing your legs is what makes you comfortable, use the “knee-over-knee ” style. Don’t hesitate to use gestures to emphasise a point. While gesturing, fingers extended together are more effective than fingers splayed out.
Anxious interviewees with trembling hands find it helpful to interlace their fingers for a few initial minutes of the interview. Avoid excessive use of gestures like rubbing the chin, tapping the nose, tucking in an errant strand of hair, chewing on a lip – these can indicate nervousness. Remember to breathe deep to keep stress at bay. Visualise positive before entering the interview room. A calm mind can easily overcome physical signs of nervousness. Train yourself to avoid ‘fillers’ like sounds such as ‘uhh’, ‘umm’ and so on, and words like ‘basically’ , ‘means’ , and ‘like’ as stopgaps between sentences. Don’t be afraid of using silence to punctuate your ideas. Laughter, if used judiciously, can add a welcome human element.
When the interview is over...
As you rise gracefully and collect your folder or bag, remember to use the ‘smile + handshake + pleasant leave taking’ formula. No matter how happy or disappointed you are with the interview, let your posture and walk convey only positivity and strength.
Avoid:
A weak or hesitant handshake – don’t use the ‘dead fish’ handshake. Poor eye contact, or blinking too frequently when stressed. Keeping eye contact only with the ‘sympathetic listener’ among many interviewers , ignoring other interview panelists.
Slumped or bowed shoulders, a hunched posture. Crossing the arms across the chest – you may seem close-minded, intimidated or defensive A high-pitched tone or speaking faster than usual, when stressed Using “verbal tics” , such as “Isn’t it?” or “Don’t you think so?” frequently Saying “In my opinion” or “I think” . What you say is anyway what you think; don’t further qualify your statement Using a smile that doesn’t reach the eyes – nervousness can sometimes lead to fake-looking smiles. Remember to stay tuned into your own strengths and let the smile be genuine.
Some specific gestures and their meanings:
Rubbing the nose while listening — Being cautious or even skeptical about what is being said Covering part of the mouth / fidgeting around the chin area - while speaking — Being less than completely honest Covering part of the mouth while listening — Disbelieving what is being said Head slightly tilted to one side while listening — Concentrating on the words Tugging the earlobes Carefully evaluating the pros and cons of what is being said Country, culture, age and gender are some of the factors that influence interpretation of BL. Remember to use your gut instincts to understand a situation. To learn more, check out, “How to read a Person Like a Book” By J. Fast and “People Watching - the Desmond Morris guide to Body Language” .
Piya Mukherjee
Author is corporate trainer & visiting faculty at management institutes in Mumbai
Source:ET
Eye contact –
to signal interest, trust, integrity , attentiveness
Facial expressions –
to convey a gamut of mind-states like happiness, surprise, skepticism, disappointment
Posture –
to indicate attentiveness or ease, anxiety or a relaxed mental frame
Gestures –
to display a range of messages including open-mindedness , conviction, confidence, caution or ambiguity
Touch –
to show camaraderie, encouragement , support or friendliness “Space bubble” (i.e. the comfortable distance that we like to maintain around ourselves, while interacting with others) – to indicate our level of comfort with those around
Para language –
pitch, tone, inflection – to communicate various mind states such as enthusiasm, passion, anguish, boredom
Ideal BL for an interview
Since BL mirrors the mind, our posture and gestures will reflect our state of mind. It is great to walk in with a smile, maintain eye contact and offer a firm handshake.
As you walk in...
Eye contact, expression– Keep the eye contact direct. Match it with a smiling countenance and a direct gaze to convey confidence. Remember to maintain eye contact with all the interviewers, while answering a question, although you may choose to focus more on the questioner than on the others. Posture – Shoulders back, head high and spine straight, works well.
Choice of seating–
If faced with a choice of more than one seating option, opt for either a chair that is at a non-confrontational angle to the interviewer’s chair (i.e. at right angles to it, not facing it directly), or, choose the central chair of a trio of chairs.
As the interview proceeds...
Sit erect, without slouching. Don’t go to the other extreme either – sitting perched on the edge of the seat indicates anxiety. If crossing your legs is what makes you comfortable, use the “knee-over-knee ” style. Don’t hesitate to use gestures to emphasise a point. While gesturing, fingers extended together are more effective than fingers splayed out.
Anxious interviewees with trembling hands find it helpful to interlace their fingers for a few initial minutes of the interview. Avoid excessive use of gestures like rubbing the chin, tapping the nose, tucking in an errant strand of hair, chewing on a lip – these can indicate nervousness. Remember to breathe deep to keep stress at bay. Visualise positive before entering the interview room. A calm mind can easily overcome physical signs of nervousness. Train yourself to avoid ‘fillers’ like sounds such as ‘uhh’, ‘umm’ and so on, and words like ‘basically’ , ‘means’ , and ‘like’ as stopgaps between sentences. Don’t be afraid of using silence to punctuate your ideas. Laughter, if used judiciously, can add a welcome human element.
When the interview is over...
As you rise gracefully and collect your folder or bag, remember to use the ‘smile + handshake + pleasant leave taking’ formula. No matter how happy or disappointed you are with the interview, let your posture and walk convey only positivity and strength.
Avoid:
A weak or hesitant handshake – don’t use the ‘dead fish’ handshake. Poor eye contact, or blinking too frequently when stressed. Keeping eye contact only with the ‘sympathetic listener’ among many interviewers , ignoring other interview panelists.
Slumped or bowed shoulders, a hunched posture. Crossing the arms across the chest – you may seem close-minded, intimidated or defensive A high-pitched tone or speaking faster than usual, when stressed Using “verbal tics” , such as “Isn’t it?” or “Don’t you think so?” frequently Saying “In my opinion” or “I think” . What you say is anyway what you think; don’t further qualify your statement Using a smile that doesn’t reach the eyes – nervousness can sometimes lead to fake-looking smiles. Remember to stay tuned into your own strengths and let the smile be genuine.
Some specific gestures and their meanings:
Rubbing the nose while listening — Being cautious or even skeptical about what is being said Covering part of the mouth / fidgeting around the chin area - while speaking — Being less than completely honest Covering part of the mouth while listening — Disbelieving what is being said Head slightly tilted to one side while listening — Concentrating on the words Tugging the earlobes Carefully evaluating the pros and cons of what is being said Country, culture, age and gender are some of the factors that influence interpretation of BL. Remember to use your gut instincts to understand a situation. To learn more, check out, “How to read a Person Like a Book” By J. Fast and “People Watching - the Desmond Morris guide to Body Language” .
Piya Mukherjee
Author is corporate trainer & visiting faculty at management institutes in Mumbai
Source:ET