dear diary .....
26aug 2070
Okay, so its really the next day, but I'm still awake, so its still the 16th. I didn't know that I could possibly sleep anymore than I did. Matt obviously was asleep that night, and then when I finally went to sleep, I slept through the rest of the next day. So he didn't know that I was awake. He of course told me this today because he was so worried about me. I thought he was going to crumple to the ground when he came back today, and saw that I was awake. What have I done to him? Did I make the wrong choice? No! Everything happens for a reason. Geez...my whole mind and body feels screwed up.
What do I do? I feel hopeless, and if my idea is to go as planned, I can't be hopeless. I can't show my fear, and yet I can't make myself look cold infront of hundreds that still live. I asked for this though...didn't I? I asked for every drop of it. Even before I came here. I need a cigg, and I need to make a list. So I light up another stick, and inhale its deathly taste into my lungs.
#1 I need to collect myself
#2 I need to talk to everyone about my idea
#3 I need to have Cheg make a crew of at least ten people to send out to get food, water, blankets, firewood (to purify the water by boiling it), medical supplies.
#4 I need him to make another crew of at lest ten people to find anything we can fashion into a weapon. Rock, metal objects (I don't care if they are forks out of utensil drawer)
#5 Once this is accomplished, we all need to set reinforcements up at the north, south, east, and west parts of the outpost. The help of the Nightwings will come in handy here.
#6 All children need to be put back into safety. The first place any enemies are going to look is at the center of the outpost. If they get there the children are done for. Must cotemplate this more.
#7 We need some reliable scouts to go check the cameras, and another group to sneak close enough to the other outpost to find out what they are doing.
#8 Nick needs to go get his armor recharged. I don't know if we can spare anyone to go with him for protection, but if he is to survive this, it must be done.
#9 The radiation coming off the bombs is making the people extremely sick, and there is no medicine here to cure them accept my own healing. How do I save so many and survive myself? The food is contaminated, and even after cooking it, nothing seems to get rid of all the poison. So I will have to expend more energy to heal the animals of the poison without killing myself. This leads to a dangerous idea. First, I need to have Matt and a hunting crew heard these animals into the outpost before my idea can take form.
#10 Fe is going to be put in charge of getting the kids to safety once we all figure out the best place. If we could find a bunker undergroud, it would be great. But there are none in the outpost. hmm...this doesn't sound to bad.
#11 I'm done! for now...one step at a time as fast as possible.
I'm not trying to take over Cheg's lead, but these are things that must be done. Once they are, we will have a better standing. That and some of the plans must be done more than just once. If we want to survive, people have to risk their lives unfortunately. There is no way around it. Either way some or all might die. Locking ourselves in a corner is only going to kill us. If there is nothing done about the poison, it is going to kill us. If there is nothing done about the other outpost, they are going to kill us. There are only Six of us who can lead these people, and six doesn't seem big enough. Cheg, Ishrat, Me, Nick, Anajo, and Matt. I can't think anymore...I just can't. I will review my list with Cheg tomorrow, and then with everyone else. After that I will figure out my new idea.