Why was the blood donation unsuccessful?
Because it was all in vein
Did I ever tell you the story about the broken pencil?
It had no point.
What's Mary short for?
She's got no legs.
Why did the engineer put a clock under his desk?
He wanted to work overtime.
A man is riding on his bike through a very dense forest in the evening. After about an hour he sees a peacock appear all of a sudden in the way - and the peacock is smiling at him.
The man feels its kinda weird and carries on traveling. Another hour passes and he sees the same peacock again in the middle of the road smiling at him.
The man is a little scared now, but says to himself that he is just tired and is just imagining things and carries on with his ride.
Yet another hour passes and he finds the peacock again appearing out of nowhere smiling at him.........
A. Because the man is riding TVS Victor and so "More smiles per hour".
In a pond there are 10 fish, one of them dies, and the water level of the pond increases. How?
The other 9 fish are crying.................
A women goes in an Auto (rickshaw) and gets bald??? How???
Automatically ( Auto-Mein-Takli).....
What wud u call a Gal who never laughs....?
HASINA !
Question:Whatz a PJ ?
Answer: Obviously "a poor joke"
Question: Whatz a (P + i J)?
Answer: "complex poor joke"
But why don't people laugh on a "complex poor joke" ?
A Bcoz the joke part of it is imaginary.
Why shouldn't you try to swim on a full stomach ?
Because it's easier to swim on a full swimming pool !
Why is that man standing in the sink ?
He's a tap dancer !
What is a myth?
A female moth
What is the best hand to write with?
Neither - it's best to write with a pen!
Have you ever seen a duchess?
Yes - it's the same as an English "s"!
If two's company and three a crowd, what are four and five?
Nine
What does one star say to another star when they meet?
Glad to meteor!
Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
To draw the curtains!
What's the difference between an American student and an English student?
About 3000 miles!
Why is Russia a very fast country?
Because the people are always Russian!
Why is perfume obedient?
Because it is scent wherever it goes
Why are giraffes necks so long?
So it will reach it's head
What is the laziest mountain in the world?
Mount Ever - rest !!
Why does a traffic light turn red?
You would too if you had to change in front of so many people !!!
Why did the bald man put rabbits on his head ?
Someone said that from a distance they looked like hairs !!!!
Why was Cinderella kicked off the cricket team?
She always ran away from the ball !!
Why can't 2 elephants go swimming ?
Because they only have on pair of trunks between them .
Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
To win the nobell prize
How do you keep a bull from charging?
Take it's credit card!
What is black, white , and red all over?
A newspaper!
Ek aadmi bank se bahar aake ek auto mein chada....autowala usko uska ghar legayaaur 100 rs liya.
Jabki actually, it wouldn't have costed more than 10 rs. Agle din, subah jab woh aadmi jagaa, he was not able to see anything.
kuch bhi nahin dikh raha tha But then, raat hote hi, uski aankh theekh ho gayi and he was able to see everything clearly.
WHY?
Kyonki autowaale ne us aadmi ko ULLOO bana diya tha!!!
Champu and Pampu are 2 elephant friends. Champu is in love with Champi, the elephant beauty queen.
Champu proposes to Champi and she rejects him for some other rich elephant across the river.
Champu is very sad, so Pampu consoles Champu and asks him to play see-saw at the garden.
Suddenly the see-saw breaks... and they burst into a song...................
guess which one.... ........................
See-Saw ho ya dil ho.... aakhirrrrrr...toot jaata hai....toot jaata hai...toot jaata hai....!!!!!
The Maratha Regiment was fighting hard on the border against the enemies....
They had to cross the border to capture the enemy base....
but no one was able to cross the border and go across fearing death.
Just then Hawaldar Pawan Kumar Jhonke ...got up and crossed the border.....and nothing happened to him.
Why??
Kyon ki Panchi Nadiya PAWAN K JHONKE... Koi Sarhad na Inhe roke...(from Refugee)
A friend gives a barrel full of FEVICOL to his friend on his birthday. What does this friend who receive the gift sing ???
Dushman na kare dost ne ye kaam kiya hai Umra bhar ka gham (gum) hame inaam diya hai........
One day James Bond goes to buy a pan. The pan walla asks him 4 Rs. for the pan but James Bond gives him only 1.5 rs.
When paan waala asks him for the rest of the money ...
Bond replies ....?????
Dhai (2.5) another day...
What do you call two banana peels?
A pair of slippers.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
Fsh
Why does a lobster never share?
Because it is a shellfish.
Refreshing, isnt it?
So guys keep posting as it is these jokes that can help us Relieve some pressures and indeed make our day worthwhile!!
Because it was all in vein
Did I ever tell you the story about the broken pencil?
It had no point.
What's Mary short for?
She's got no legs.
Why did the engineer put a clock under his desk?
He wanted to work overtime.
A man is riding on his bike through a very dense forest in the evening. After about an hour he sees a peacock appear all of a sudden in the way - and the peacock is smiling at him.
The man feels its kinda weird and carries on traveling. Another hour passes and he sees the same peacock again in the middle of the road smiling at him.
The man is a little scared now, but says to himself that he is just tired and is just imagining things and carries on with his ride.
Yet another hour passes and he finds the peacock again appearing out of nowhere smiling at him.........
A. Because the man is riding TVS Victor and so "More smiles per hour".
In a pond there are 10 fish, one of them dies, and the water level of the pond increases. How?
The other 9 fish are crying.................
A women goes in an Auto (rickshaw) and gets bald??? How???
Automatically ( Auto-Mein-Takli).....
What wud u call a Gal who never laughs....?
HASINA !
Question:Whatz a PJ ?
Answer: Obviously "a poor joke"
Question: Whatz a (P + i J)?
Answer: "complex poor joke"
But why don't people laugh on a "complex poor joke" ?
A Bcoz the joke part of it is imaginary.
Why shouldn't you try to swim on a full stomach ?
Because it's easier to swim on a full swimming pool !
Why is that man standing in the sink ?
He's a tap dancer !
What is a myth?
A female moth
What is the best hand to write with?
Neither - it's best to write with a pen!
Have you ever seen a duchess?
Yes - it's the same as an English "s"!
If two's company and three a crowd, what are four and five?
Nine
What does one star say to another star when they meet?
Glad to meteor!
Why did the man take a pencil to bed?
To draw the curtains!
What's the difference between an American student and an English student?
About 3000 miles!
Why is Russia a very fast country?
Because the people are always Russian!
Why is perfume obedient?
Because it is scent wherever it goes
Why are giraffes necks so long?
So it will reach it's head
What is the laziest mountain in the world?
Mount Ever - rest !!
Why does a traffic light turn red?
You would too if you had to change in front of so many people !!!
Why did the bald man put rabbits on his head ?
Someone said that from a distance they looked like hairs !!!!
Why was Cinderella kicked off the cricket team?
She always ran away from the ball !!
Why can't 2 elephants go swimming ?
Because they only have on pair of trunks between them .
Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
To win the nobell prize
How do you keep a bull from charging?
Take it's credit card!
What is black, white , and red all over?
A newspaper!
Ek aadmi bank se bahar aake ek auto mein chada....autowala usko uska ghar legayaaur 100 rs liya.
Jabki actually, it wouldn't have costed more than 10 rs. Agle din, subah jab woh aadmi jagaa, he was not able to see anything.
kuch bhi nahin dikh raha tha But then, raat hote hi, uski aankh theekh ho gayi and he was able to see everything clearly.
WHY?
Kyonki autowaale ne us aadmi ko ULLOO bana diya tha!!!
Champu and Pampu are 2 elephant friends. Champu is in love with Champi, the elephant beauty queen.
Champu proposes to Champi and she rejects him for some other rich elephant across the river.
Champu is very sad, so Pampu consoles Champu and asks him to play see-saw at the garden.
Suddenly the see-saw breaks... and they burst into a song...................
guess which one.... ........................
See-Saw ho ya dil ho.... aakhirrrrrr...toot jaata hai....toot jaata hai...toot jaata hai....!!!!!
The Maratha Regiment was fighting hard on the border against the enemies....
They had to cross the border to capture the enemy base....
but no one was able to cross the border and go across fearing death.
Just then Hawaldar Pawan Kumar Jhonke ...got up and crossed the border.....and nothing happened to him.
Why??
Kyon ki Panchi Nadiya PAWAN K JHONKE... Koi Sarhad na Inhe roke...(from Refugee)
A friend gives a barrel full of FEVICOL to his friend on his birthday. What does this friend who receive the gift sing ???
Dushman na kare dost ne ye kaam kiya hai Umra bhar ka gham (gum) hame inaam diya hai........
One day James Bond goes to buy a pan. The pan walla asks him 4 Rs. for the pan but James Bond gives him only 1.5 rs.
When paan waala asks him for the rest of the money ...
Bond replies ....?????
Dhai (2.5) another day...
What do you call two banana peels?
A pair of slippers.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
Fsh
Why does a lobster never share?
Because it is a shellfish.
Refreshing, isnt it?
So guys keep posting as it is these jokes that can help us Relieve some pressures and indeed make our day worthwhile!!
