One Liners !!

Interesting One Liners





Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while driving.

Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they wanted cash

A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms.


Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent

Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without,,, but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.


You can't buy love . . . but you pay heavily for it

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.

Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

A succes sful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.

It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books.

Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something

They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom g ets to speak!
 
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired

lolz... So true... who said i am lazy... i just like to rest to make sure i dun get tired... before i get tired :p
 
Don't make me think
It Hurts!!


I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.


don't be so open-minded your may brains fall out.



when i'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded


dont hit me, my lawyers in jail



Of all the things i have lost ... i miss my mind the most


God is real, unless U declare him an integer


Don't be stupid, we have politicians for that


I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants
 
Do bright children glow in the dark

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

Dont follow me i'm lost too...

I don't have an attitude problem....
you have a perception problem

I AM NOT PAID ENOUGH TO BE NICE TO YOU

Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.

You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them.

Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others
 
You can't buy love . . . but you pay heavily for it

Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent

Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while driving.

Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.

I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they wanted cash

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
 
Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Light travels faster than sound.That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

How come wrong numbers are never busy?

I love cats...they taste just like chicken
 
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