MAXDROIT
Vyankatesh Rathi
George Bush was sitting in his office wondering whom
to invade next when his telephone rang.
"Hallo, Mr. Bush!" a heavily accented voice aid. "This
is Faisal Ali from Banga, District Multan. I am
ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring
war on you!" "Well, Faisal," Bush replied, "This is
indeed important news! How big is your army?" "Right
now," said Faisal, after a moment's
calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Khan, my next
door neighbour Bhagoo, and the entire kabadi team from
the village. That makes eight"
Bush paused. "I must tell you, Faisal that I have one
million men in my army waiting to move on my
command." "BLOODY Hell " said Faisal. "I'll have to
ring you back!" Sure enough, the next day, Faisal
called again. "Mr. Bush, it is Faisal, I'm calling
from Banga STD, the war is still on! We have managed
to acquire some infantry equipment!" "And what
equipment would that be, Faisal?" Bush asked. "Well,
we have two combines, a donkey and Amjad's tractor."
Bush sighed. "I must tell you, Faisal, that I have
16,000 tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers.
Also, I've increased my army to 1-1/2 million since we
last spoke."
"Oh teri (oops)....." said Faisal. "I'll have to get
back to you." Sure enough, Faisal rang again the next
day. "Mr. Bush, the war is still on! We have managed
to get ourselves airborne ...... We've modified
Amjads's tractor by adding a couple of shotguns,
sticking on some wings and the pind's generator. Four
boys from Malpur have joined us as well!" Bush was
silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I
must tell you, Faisal, that I have 10,000 bombers and
20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is
surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile
sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army
to TWO MILLION!" "Tera pala hove ...." said
Faisal, "I'll have to ring you back."
Sure enough, Faisal called again the next
day. "Kehse?, Mr. Bush! I am sorry to tell you that we
have had to call off the war." "I'm sorry to hear
that," said Bush. "Why the sudden change of
heart?" "Well," said Faisal, "we've all had a long
chat over a couple of paranthe and decided there's no
way we can feed two million prisoners!."
to invade next when his telephone rang.
"Hallo, Mr. Bush!" a heavily accented voice aid. "This
is Faisal Ali from Banga, District Multan. I am
ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring
war on you!" "Well, Faisal," Bush replied, "This is
indeed important news! How big is your army?" "Right
now," said Faisal, after a moment's
calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Khan, my next
door neighbour Bhagoo, and the entire kabadi team from
the village. That makes eight"
Bush paused. "I must tell you, Faisal that I have one
million men in my army waiting to move on my
command." "BLOODY Hell " said Faisal. "I'll have to
ring you back!" Sure enough, the next day, Faisal
called again. "Mr. Bush, it is Faisal, I'm calling
from Banga STD, the war is still on! We have managed
to acquire some infantry equipment!" "And what
equipment would that be, Faisal?" Bush asked. "Well,
we have two combines, a donkey and Amjad's tractor."
Bush sighed. "I must tell you, Faisal, that I have
16,000 tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers.
Also, I've increased my army to 1-1/2 million since we
last spoke."
"Oh teri (oops)....." said Faisal. "I'll have to get
back to you." Sure enough, Faisal rang again the next
day. "Mr. Bush, the war is still on! We have managed
to get ourselves airborne ...... We've modified
Amjads's tractor by adding a couple of shotguns,
sticking on some wings and the pind's generator. Four
boys from Malpur have joined us as well!" Bush was
silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I
must tell you, Faisal, that I have 10,000 bombers and
20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is
surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile
sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army
to TWO MILLION!" "Tera pala hove ...." said
Faisal, "I'll have to ring you back."
Sure enough, Faisal called again the next
day. "Kehse?, Mr. Bush! I am sorry to tell you that we
have had to call off the war." "I'm sorry to hear
that," said Bush. "Why the sudden change of
heart?" "Well," said Faisal, "we've all had a long
chat over a couple of paranthe and decided there's no
way we can feed two million prisoners!."