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These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the...

A Sardar and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York . The American asks if he would like to play a fun-game. The Sardar, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The American...

A Junior Software engineer, a Senior Software engineer and their Project Manager are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears. The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will...

A teacher teaching Maths to seven-year-old Arnav asked him, “If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?”Within a few seconds Arnav replied confidently, “Four!” The dismayed teacher was expecting an effortless correct answer...

A wife was very unhappy with her car and complained a lot to her husband: "Buy me a surprise for my birthday" she said. "Something that accelerates from 0 to 80 in 4 seconds"......" And I would prefer a blue one please"! Happy and excited she was counting down the days for her birthday...

The working woman in your life...very well expressed... Tomorrow you may get a working woman, but you should marry with these facts as well. Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are; Who is earning almost as much as you do; One, who has dreams and aspirations...

Rishte ki baat - Sholay Style Jay : Mausi, ladka ICICI Bank mein kaam karta hai.. Mausi : Haaye Ram..! Aur kahin try kar raha hai kya?? Jay : kahan mausi 2 saal ICICI Bank me rahne ke baad koi Company leti kahan hai... Mausi : Hi Raam to kya 2 saal se ICICI Bank mein hi hai.. Jay : haan...

Shaadi ke pehle Aur Baad Shaadi ke pehle - Agar Tum Na Hote :( Shaadi ke baad - Agar Tum Na Hote :) Shaadi ke pehle - Maine Pyar Kiya :) Shaadi ke baad - Ye Maine Kya Kiya? :( Shaadi ke pehle - Kuch Kuch Hota Hai :) Shaadi ke baad - Kuch Nahi Hota Hai :( Shaadi ke pehle - Dil To Pagal...

How various people choose their wives Allah ke nam pe koi ek biwi de de, Doosre ki nahi to apni de de, Allah tujhe ek ke badle do dega, Hillery hogi to Monika bhi dega Lawyer I hereby beg to solicit myself as an ., eligible candidate for the post of husband after marriage. The person...

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. God works in Mysterious ways. After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers. The...

DECIDE Hansa : Praful "Decide" matlab ? Praful : "Decide" Hansa ... vo Casettee player mein hum casettee nahi dalte usme hota hai na ... "A side" -- "B side" ... toa "C-side" ... "D- side" ---> "Decide" Mature Hansa : Mature matlab ???? praful: jab apna mahesh...chori karte hue pakda gaya...

A man walks past a beggar every day and gives him Rs. 10 and that Continues for a year. Then suddenly the daily donation changes to Rs. 7, 50. "Well," the beggar thinks, "it's still better than nothing ." A year passes in this way until the man's daily donation suddenly becomes Rs. 5...

A little girl asked her father: How did the human race get here? The father answered: God made Adam and Eve and they had children and so all mankind was made. Two days later she asks her mother the same question. The mother answered: Many years ago there were monkeys who came down out of the...

Little Bobby came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted. Mom, I want a bike for my birthday. Little Bobby was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school...

In a small town in India, a person decided to open up his Bar business, which was right opposite to the Temple. The Temple & its congregation started a campaign to block the Bar from opening with petitions and prayed daily against his business. Work progressed. However, when it was almost...

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." Winston Churchill "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." William Faulkner (about...

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846. John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946. Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860. John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960. Both were particularly concerned with civil rights. Both wives lost their children while living in the...

One night a guy took his girlfriend home. As they were about to wish each other goodnight at the front door, the guy started feeling a little in the mood. With an air of confidence, he leaned with his hand against the wall and smiling, he said to her "Honey, would you give me a kiss?"...

1: I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. 2: You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all. 3: Sorry to have missed you but I am at the...

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.. He asks one of his new students to stand and..... Prof: So you believe in God? Student: Absolutely, sir. Prof : Is God good? Student: Sure. Prof: Is God all-powerful...