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Business one-liners 48 There is no job so simple that it cannot be done wrnog. There is no job so simple that it cannot be done wrrong. There is no limit to how bad things can get. There is no limit to the amount of good that people can accomplish, if they don't care who gets the credit...

Business one-liners 47 There are two things on earth that are universal: hydrogen and stupidity. There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking. There has been an alarming increase in the number of things you know...

Business one-liners 46 The value of a program is proportional to the weight of its output. The workbench is always untidier than last time. The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you. The yoo-hoo you you-hew into the forest is the yoo-hoo you get back. There are no...

Business one-liners 45 The success of any venture will be helped by prayer, even in the wrong denomination. The sun goes down just when you need it the most. The tasks and chores that get rewarded, get done first. The telephone will ring when you are outside the door, fumbling for your keys...

Business one-liners 44 The ratio of time involved in work to time available for work is usually about 0.6. The repairman will never have seen a model quite like yours before. The road to hell is paved with good intentions and littered with sloppy analysis. The severity of the itch is...

Business one-liners 43 The only sense that is common in the long run is the sense of change. We instinctively avoid it. The only time to be positive is when you are positive you are wrong. The organization of any program reflects the organization of the people who developed it. The other line...

Business one-liners 42 The obscure we see eventually; the completely apparent takes a little longer. The one item you want is never the one on sale. The one thing that money can not buy is poverty. The one who does the least work will get the most credit. The one who says it can't be done...

Business one-liners 41 The more time you spend in reporting on what you are doing, the less time you have to do it in. Stability is achieved when you spend all your time doing nothing but reporting on the nothing you are doing. The more trivial your research, the more people will read it and...

Business one-liners 40 The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncoming train. The longer the title the less important the job. The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on. The meek shall inherit the earth, but only after we're done...

Business one-liners 39 The first time is for love, the next time is $200. The floggings will continue until morale improves. The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. - Eleanor Roosevelt The hardest thing in life to learn is which bridge to cross and which to...

Business one-liners 38 The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. The elevator always comes after you have put down your bag. The explanation of a disaster will be made by a stand-in. The factory of the future will have only two employees, a man and a...

Business one-liners 37 The crucial memorandum will be snared in the out-basket. The deadline is one week after the original deadline. The deficiency will never show itself during the test run. The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work. The difference between a stepping...

Business one-liners 36 The bigger they are, the harder they hit. The book you spent $20.95 for today will come out in paperback tomorrow. The business plan you prepare must be a lie; but it must be a detailed and precise lie rather than a vague and general lie. The business world worships...

Business one-liners 35 The "think positive" leader tends to listen to his subordinate's premonitions only during the postmortems. The amount of flak received on any subject is inversely proportional to the subject's true value. The average man's judgement is so poor, he runs a risk every time...

Business one-liners 34 Success is the active process of making your dreams real and inspiring others to dream. - James Anders Honeycutt Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism. Tact is the art of convincing people that they know more than they do. Take care to get what you like or...

Business one-liners 33 Some of it plus the rest of it is all of it. Some see things as they are and ask 'why?'; I dream of things that never were and ask 'why not?'" - George Bernard Shaw Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world. Sometimes I think we are alone in the...

Business one-liners 32 Seisline prayer: O Lord, grant that we may always be right, for thou knowest we will never change our minds. Sanity and insanity overlap a fine gray line. Say no, then negotiate. Science is always simple and always profound. It is only the half-truths that are...

Business one-liners 31 Real programmers don't grumble about the disadvantages of Fortran when they don't know any other language. Real programmers don't notch their desks for each completed service request. Real programmers don't number paragraph names consecutively. Real programmers print...

Business one-liners 30 Programming errors which would normally require one day to find will take five days when the programmer is in a hurry. Progress is made by lazy men looking for an easier way to do things. Progress is made on alternate Fridays. Progress may have been all right once, but...

Business one-liners 29 Persons disagreeing with your facts are always emotional and employ faulty reasoning. Pessimists have already begun to worry about what is going to replace automation. Pick good people; talent never wears out. Pills to be taken in twos always come out of the bottle in...